• Samira Aden

How to Build Your Self-Esteem



Building your self-esteem is a long journey that you must be patient to see results. It’s kind of like working out; but you’re working your mind out. Mental health is as important as physical health, so you must acknowledge your emotions, not suppress them. The first step is to take note of your thoughts: what do you think of yourself? Do you care about what others say or think? Think about the environment that you are in and surround yourself in.


To help what you think about yourself, ask why you think that. Is it because of what people around you say? If so, you can express your emotions if you’re comfortable. If friends say this around you, or to you, they are simply not a good influence and can be toxic. I’ve had “friends” that were toxic, so I decided to cut them out of my life: it’s one the best decisions that I’ve made and it has helped me tremendously with my self-esteem.


Or is it about societal standards or internal thoughts? Challenge those thoughts, practice thinking and talking to yourself positively. Hype yourself up like you do for your friends, practice some self-love! If you repeat those thoughts, you’re more likely to gain more confidence. You don’t have to fit that mold, you’re not less worthy because you don’t fit it. Break down those barriers that you have put on yourself; it’ll lead you to a path to self-worth. Trust me, I’ve been there. I was not confident, and my self-esteem was horrible. It took a while, I’ll be honest, but I’m the happiest I’ve ever been.


If this doesn’t work, try doing accurate and constructive thoughts. This applies to public speaking and your GPA especially. If it doesn’t meet your expectations, don’t criticize yourself, forgive yourself and don’t be too harsh. Change your vocabulary, don’t say that it “must” go this way or be this way. Think about solutions to those problems: seek advice and take notice of your methods and what could be changed. Don’t put your worth on something that does not define you.


Here are some important tips to help you on your journey. NEVER compare yourself to others; you are you, and you may never know what others are going through. This leads to self-dwelling.


You’re already enough. Don’t put yourself down for something so arbitrary. Write in a journal about progress; little things may seem insignificant to you right now, but when you look back, you’ll see the self-worth growing. NEVER put someone’s thoughts onto yourself: their thoughts DO NOT matter. The only thoughts that matter are the ones that you think about yourself: so deconstruct those thoughts, accept them, forgive yourself, and work on your path to building your self-esteem.


Good luck! I’m rooting for you! :)



Sources:


https://www.mayoclinic.org/healthy-lifestyle/adult-health/in-depth/self-esteem/art-20045374

https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/nurturing-self-compassion/201703/8-steps-improving-your-self-esteem


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